I made you a Magic Eight Ball so that you don't have to.

Simply Python. Accepts question as a parameter or from a pipe.

$ echo -e "Are we there yet?" | m8b.py 
Your question: Are we there yet?
My answer: You may rely on it.
$ ./m8b.py "Do I need more coffee?"
Your question: Do I need more coffee?
My answer: Most likely.

Code:

#!/usr/bin/python3
from random import randrange
import sys

ballmap = {
    1: "It is certain.",
    2: "It is decidedly so.",
    3: "Without a doubt.",
    4: "Yes – definitely.",
    5: "You may rely on it.",
    6: "As I see it, yes.",
    7: "Most likely.",
    8: "Outlook good.",
    9: "Yes.",
    10: "Signs point to yes.",
    11: "Reply hazy, try again.",
    12: "Ask again later.",
    13: "Better not tell you now.",
    14: "Cannot predict now.",
    15: "Concentrate and ask again.",
    16: "Don't count on it.",
    17: "My reply is no.",
    18: "My sources say no.",
    19: "Outlook not so good.",
    20: "Very doubtful."
}

def main():
    if len(sys.argv) > 1:
        q = sys.argv[1]
    elif not sys.stdin.isatty():
        q = sys.stdin.readlines()
        q = q[0]

    res = ballmap[randrange(1,20)]
    if "q" in locals():
        print("Your question: " + q.rstrip())

    print("My answer: " + res)

if __name__ == '__main__':
    main()